[Kaworu doesn't even take the time to get dressed for the weather. The cold doesn't matter to him anyway, and he doesn't want to go any longer without seeing Shinji. So when he arrives outside of Shinji's rover, he's wearing the thinner clothes he was going to sleep in, and he looks almost like he's just been fleeing. For once, he isn't perfectly composed. There's an urgency to him.]
[In contrast Shinji's bundled as always, dressed for the weather. He waits, curled into himself, standing awkwardly at the bottom of the steps to his rover. When he hears the snow crunch beneath feet he turns, spotting Kaworu. He's a bit nervous, unsure of why Kaworu wants to see him suddenly. The other boy is barely wearing anything at all. Surely he'll freeze, won't he?
[Kaworu stops in front of Shinji - not too close, but near enough that the cloud of his breath in the snowy night mists in Shinji's direction - and stares at him, eerie in the night.]
[The urgency of it all is enough to make him start doubting himself. Had he said something wrong? The staring is enough to make him feel self conscious. What had he done now...]
[The wintry air feels so fresh in Kaworu's lungs. Finally he looks away from Shinji, when he tilts his head back and stares instead at the blaze of stars in the night sky. He's quiet for a short moment.
[The apology hits him hard, leaves his stomach feeling empty. This isn't what he was expecting to hear. Not in the slightest. Immediately he can recall the agony he felt when he'd ended Kaworu's life. The despair and depth of sorrow, as if someone had snuffed out the only light in his life and that someone had been himself.]
...I'm sorry too.
[He already apologized for what he'd done but it feels necessary to do so again. He doesn't want it to happen ever again.]
[And now his eyes are on Shinji again, and he's reaching out, and his bare hands - not cold from the air, but a mellow sort of cool - are resting at the sides of Shinji's face.]
[The contact makes him freeze up, startled as he's forced to look into Kaworu's deep red eyes. He feels as if he could drown in them and that would be okay. He wouldn't mind it. His smile is sweet and inviting.
How could that be, though? How could he believe such a thing? His voice is thin, strained. Emotion is already welling up inside him, threatening to spill over.]
[Ah, there it is. Despite his best efforts, a few tears spill over, hot and wet as they roll down his cheeks, the cold biting at his exposed skin. He knows Kaworu is right but he still held such guilt toward it. How couldn't he feel guilty?]
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Maybe your happiness does lie somewhere else. But don't flee just because of your mistakes.
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You make me happy.
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FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
I do?
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When I'm with you...I feel happy.
FROM: ikari.shinji@cdc.org
Before I met Kaworu-kun, I had forgot what that felt like.
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FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
I want to see you.
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Right now?
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Right now, I want to see you, Shinji-kun.
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Where should I meet you, Kaworu-kun?
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I'll come to you. Will you wait for me? Outside of your rover.
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Okay. I'll wait.
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Did Angels even feel cold?]
Kaworu-kun, you're going to catch a cold...!
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I didn't want to wait.
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...Are you okay?
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[The intensity of his atmosphere doesn't let up, though. He's studying Shinji like a map.]
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You did? But I'm here, Kaworu-kun...I haven't gone anywhere.
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[The wintry air feels so fresh in Kaworu's lungs. Finally he looks away from Shinji, when he tilts his head back and stares instead at the blaze of stars in the night sky. He's quiet for a short moment.
Then,] You said I make you happy.
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[He shifts his weight as he stands in the snow, arms hugging his middle tight.]
When I'm with you, I feel happy. Happier than I ever am...
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I didn't stay with you, so I took your happiness away.
Shinji-kun, I'm sorry.
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...I'm sorry too.
[He already apologized for what he'd done but it feels necessary to do so again. He doesn't want it to happen ever again.]
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[And now his eyes are on Shinji again, and he's reaching out, and his bare hands - not cold from the air, but a mellow sort of cool - are resting at the sides of Shinji's face.]
You've never sinned against me.
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How could that be, though? How could he believe such a thing? His voice is thin, strained. Emotion is already welling up inside him, threatening to spill over.]
B-But I killed you...
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[His face softens from its urgency.]
And that was my sin.
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Kaworu-kun...
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You're the most beautiful part of my life. I don't want that to end.
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